(Wiffle Ball was) The Great Equalizer

great equalizer your own backyard panorama upstate new york

Does the backyard where you grew up still seem big?

These are the bases that were made of frisbees or squares of plywood. Bases that were filled with ‘ghost runners’ in 2-on-2 games of wiffleball. Ghosts that we could certainly see from the left-handed batters box with two outs and the game- nay, two outs and The Wiffle Ball World Series on the line.

This is the pitchers mound where you stared in at your best friend or little brother at the plate. With a yellow or orange plastic bat in their hand, you wanted nothing more than to make them feel terrible about themselves; a swinging strikeout or stupid pop-up back to the mound. For a brief moment at 16 they’re the greatest enemy you’ve ever known.

This is left field. A short distance away and a jumble of maple trees. They’re like weeds, you know. Somehow no matter how hard you tried, you could never catch a fly ball falling out of these trees.

This is the neighbors’ yard and driveway past left field. The driveway that forced a bunch of right-handed hitters to learn how to hit left-handed after some complaints about wiffleballs and parked cars coming together. I’ll never be convinced that a wiffleball could damage a car, but rules are rules.

This is the garden in straight-away centerfield. A full 78-feet from home plate, this was the deepest part of the park. Does that still seem far away, now that you’ve seen the world? Everyone will tell you how they once hit one into the garden, but no one believes them.

This is the home run tree in right field. A perfect distance for not-too-many homers, it was the perfect distance for a bunch of righties learning how to bat left-handed. And they were a perfect distance for a natural lefty to swing a plastic bat too hard and gain limited success. Wiffleball was the great equalizer.

This is home plate and this is home. Where there was no umpire and you learned to trust your opponent to make the right call. To compromise when needed. Out there by the ‘home run tree’ in right field, on the border with the neighbors- where you almost won the world series in the rain, only to see it settle safely into your little brother’s glove. Does that still seem like the ‘deep part of the park’?

Out there where your comrades, too, wished they were doing what the popular kids were doing; drinking and drugs and finding out about girls. Out there where everyone was on the same level. Wiffleball was the great equalizer. Out there where you wouldn’t change a thing.

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Charlie Monte Verde

Charlie Monte Verde

As COA founder, Charlie cultivates original American art forms. Charlie was raised in Upstate New York before moving to Chicago, and honed his writing skills in Mrs. Bonar’s AP English class before he was bumped down to the regular English class.
Charlie Monte Verde

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